Amberly and Joe Lambertsen are the kind of couple who make you feel like you’ve known them forever. Married for 14 years, parents to two kids, and co-creators of A Prioritized Marriage, they’ve built more than just a life together—they’ve built a movement.

Through honest conversations, family life education, and a whole lot of shared memes, this Utah-based duo is teaching couples how to stay connected in the middle of real life. From back-deck rituals to NICU pizza nights, their approach to love is refreshingly grounded and genuinely inspiring.

Q: Let’s start with your story—how did you meet, and how has your relationship evolved since those early days?

A:
We first crossed paths in high school, when we had a class together and saw each other here and there in the neighborhood. But we didn’t officially meet or start talking until a few years later. Once we connected, everything clicked. Our early relationship was full of laughter, long walks, and evenings spent together while I worked on homework.

Now, almost 15 years later, not much has changed. And also, everything has. There’s still a lot of laughter, but our long walks have turned into slow wanders around the backyard, watering flowers or catching up on the day while we sit on the deck. And we still enjoy just being around each other, even if one of us is working.

Q: What inspired you to start A Prioritized Marriage? Was there a turning point in your own relationship that led to it?

A:
I’ve always been a hopeless romantic, someone who believes deeply in the power of love and connection. When I started college, I wasn’t even sure what path I wanted to take until I found Family Studies. On the very first day of the program, I heard someone say they wanted to become a marriage educator and that excited me!

At the same time, I had a personal blog where I shared snapshots of our marriage—the fun adventures, the everyday moments, and the challenges and joys we faced together. Combining my passion for learning about relationships with my love of writing and storytelling, I realized I could create a space that helps couples not just survive but truly prioritize and enjoy their marriages every day.

That’s how A Prioritized Marriage was born! It evolved from a college passion project and personal blog into a platform dedicated to helping couples find creative, practical ways to keep their connection strong, no matter what stage of life they’re in.

Q: One of your key messages is that marriage should come first—even before parenting. Why is that so important to you?

A:
Marriage is truly the foundation of your entire family. When your relationship with your partner is strong, it sets the tone for everything else—parenting, managing a household, running a business, or facing life’s unexpected challenges. Every piece of life is important, and working together at those things requires a strong foundation.

Putting your marriage first doesn’t mean parenting or other responsibilities get less attention. It means you’re building a partnership that can handle all those roles with teamwork, respect, and joy. When your marriage is nurtured and prioritized, you’re creating a steady, loving base that supports your whole family’s well-being.

When your kids grow up and start their own lives, the marriage you’ve cultivated can really take flight. That strong, fun foundation you’ve maintained through every stage gives you the freedom and closeness to live the life you’ve always dreamed of—together, as a team.

Q: What does prioritizing your marriage look like on a regular Tuesday—not just on big anniversaries or date nights?

A:
Prioritizing your marriage happens in the small, everyday moments—especially on an ordinary Tuesday. It might look like a quick check-in to ask: What’s going well? What do you need help with? How can I support you this week? It’s taking time to connect personally—not just as co-parents or roommates, but as partners who enjoy each other.

It could be sharing a laugh, sending a thoughtful text, or sitting together for a few minutes before bed. It’s about finding time to connect, expressing love, and staying grounded in who you are as a couple—every single day.

Q: Physical intimacy is a big part of your content. What helped you two feel more confident talking about it openly—and what do you wish more couples knew?

A:
Physical intimacy is such an important part of marriage, but it’s often one of the hardest things to talk about. What helped us feel more confident was simply choosing to talk about it—over and over again—in small, honest ways. The more we opened up, the more normal and comfortable those conversations became.

I wish more couples knew that discussing sex doesn’t take away the mystery or magic. Those discussions actually add to intimacy and enjoyment. It can be vulnerable to express your desires, ask questions, or bring up what’s working and what’s not. But when you push past the discomfort, you create space for deeper connection.

Your background or culture might make these conversations feel extra hard. Start small and build from there. The more you talk about physical intimacy, the more natural it will feel.

Q: How has your understanding of love languages changed your communication as a couple?

A:
Learning about love languages changed the way we communicate by helping us show love in ways that actually resonate with each other. In the beginning, it was easy to default to the ways we personally feel loved—but understanding our individual love languages helped us become more intentional about speaking each other’s language, not just our own.

We also learned that love languages aren’t rigid categories. You might have a primary love language, but all five matter to some degree, and they can shift in different seasons of life. The real secret? It’s not just about how you give love, but how you listen, respond, and intentionally connect in the ways your partner needs.

And when it comes to something like Words of Affirmation—it’s more than compliments or saying, “I love you.” It’s about being specific, sincere, and thoughtful in the way you encourage and uplift your partner. Even a short, meaningful message can go a long way.

Q: What’s a myth about marriage that you hear often—and completely disagree with?

A:
One myth I hear all the time—and completely disagree with—is the idea that once you have kids, they come first, and your marriage can wait until they’re grown. The truth is, if you’re not making time to prioritize your relationship every single day, there may not be much of a marriage left to return to once the kids are out of the house.

Your marriage is the foundation of your family. When that connection is strong, everything else—parenting, household management, even the hard seasons—becomes more manageable because you’re approaching it as a team.

We’re seeing more and more gray divorce—divorce among couples over the age of 50—who find themselves disconnected after years of focusing on everything but each other. That’s why it’s so important to nurture your relationship now, even in the busiest seasons. You’re not just preserving your marriage—you’re building a future you’ll both want to be part of.

Q: You're both busy people. How do you create space for quality time and connection in the middle of real life?

A:
For us, it all comes down to being intentional. We schedule time together like we would any other priority. We protect that time by being present, having fun, and choosing connection over distraction. Life gets busy, but your relationship still deserves a spot on the calendar.

Q: What are some of your go-to rituals, habits, or check-ins that keep you emotionally connected?

A:

·       Weekly marriage meetings

·       Lunch dates or date nights

·       Hanging out on the back deck (no phones!)

·       Sending each other memes and reels all day (seriously—it’s our love language)

Q: You’re also parents! What’s one way parenting has strengthened your marriage—and one way it challenged it?

A:
Parenting has both challenged and strengthened our marriage in the same way: it’s made us function as a true team. Our kids constantly bring new challenges, and often, we don’t have all the answers.

This uncertainty calls for patience, communication, and connection—reminding us that it’s us against the problem, not against each other. That mindset doesn’t just help when parenting gets tough—it shapes how we handle everyday life, too. Whether it’s managing work stress, household tasks, or unexpected curveballs, approaching life as partners in problem-solving keeps our relationship strong and united.

Q: What's been your most memorable marriage “reset” moment?

A:
When our youngest was in the NICU, life felt upside down—but we stayed grounded in each other. Weekly date nights, laughing with nurses, picnics outside the hospital. Those little pockets of connection made all the difference.

Q: What’s one lesson about marriage you learned the hard way—and now love sharing with others?

A:
Love alone isn’t enough. You need intention, effort, and consistency. You don’t need a big reset—just one intentional choice at a time.

Q: And finally, if you wanted to change the world one happy couple at a time, how would you complete this phrase: Why Don’t We _____________?

A:
Why Don’t We Create the Marriage We Always Dreamed Of—Starting Today?
Not someday. Not after the kids are grown. Right now. One small moment, one intentional choice at a time.

Amberly and Joe Lambertsen are living proof that love doesn’t just survive the chaos—it can thrive in it. They remind us that it’s not grand gestures, but small, consistent choices that shape a relationship worth having. Their journey through education, parenting, NICU challenges, and everyday life shows that intentional love is more than a mindset—it’s a practice.

If you’re looking for a roadmap for connection that’s real, doable, and rooted in joy, Amberly and Joe offer one simple invitation:

Why don’t we create the marriage we always dreamed of—starting today?